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January 16, 2010
I could use a laugh 'bout now
Well, I must say, the 12 Shows in 12
Months for 2009 was great. I hope you followed along. Just the
fact that I promised myself to do something at the beginning of
the year and then actually did what I said I was gonna do was a
big achievement for me, really.
I mean, sometimes, these kinds
of things (New Year’s Resolutions, Weight Loss/Dieting Plans,
Organizing the Closet Attempts, Financial Goals, etc.) peter out
in a few weeks. Or, in the case of organizing closet space, they
peter out in a few minutes. I know that times can get pretty
hectic, and it’s easy to find yourself “Skipping” or “Putting Off”
a month here and there.
But that didn’t happen to me,
no, not at all. And, I must say, when I was heading out the door
from last month’s concert at the Crystal Ball Room, I was feeling
a pretty nice sense of accomplishment.
That feeling could have been
the sensation of temporary hearing loss, too, but at least I was
feeling good about it.
In fact, the whole year went
by so fast, that I really didn’t even have any time to complain
about the recession. I mean, sure, there was a “Counting Crows
Service Charge” on my credit card statement, and let’s not forget
about the “Pearl Jam Access Fee.” That was a whopper. But, I was
having such a good time, I hardly even noticed.
If you followed along last
year, you now know that I made it through 12 shows, which included
17 bands that I hadn’t seen, an estimated 267 songs (I’m adding in
the opening band sets), visited 8 different venues and accumulated
to my account an untold amount of “Ticketmaster Processing
Fees/Service Charges.” (Note to self: Check
IRS 1040 Form for Ticketmaster Service Charge
Line Item Deduction). [Note to IRS:
Do Not Read this Blog.]
You also know that I braved
bad weather driving, unruly crowds, traffic, parking, $9 beers……
and that was just the line for getting into the bathroom!
If there was one thing I
learned throughout this whole process, through this great
spectacle of coming together with touring bands to listen to their
music in a meaningful way, it’s this:
We, as humans, have really not
built a perfect concert seating venue yet.
And, let me just expand on
that in a little more detail. Will someone please tell me, why,
with all of the engineering, design, ergonomic and architectural
people that are available in the world, why can’t someone please
design a concert seating system that places more than 2.5” between
your seat and the next seat in front of you? I mean, where on
earth did they get this measurement from? Did someone consult the
Table of Anthropomorphic Data from the 1832 Population Survey of
Previously Unknown Dwarf Brazilian Rainforest Populations?
Really, do these concert
seating design engineers ask themselves: OK, I’m at a show, and
I’ve got food, a drink, my jacket, a backpack, a picnic lunch for
5, I’m fumbling for a ticket and I’m trying to check the stage out
with my 1200X zoom binoculars, and Now I’ve Got to Stand Up Along
with the Entire Row because Somebody has got to get through to
their seat with THEIR food, drink, backpack, picnic lunch for 5
and 1500X zoom binoculars. How much space should I put between the
seats?
And all that nonsense happens
before the show even starts.
Now, let’s take this even one
step further. Or, I should say, let’s take it one step to the
side. Because that’s what should happen to each seat in Every
Other row. Instead of placing seats directly in line with each
other, the rows should be offset so you’re not looking directly
into the guy in front of you.
Instead, you’d be looking at
the guy directly in front of you ONE
ROW UP.
Which, just might, provide somewhat of a
better view.
See the difference here?
So, by now, you are asking
yourself the big question,
Jim, what the Heck are you
Gonna Do this Year? Sit around in 2010 and save a bunch of money
when there’s perfectly good entertainment to go out and see?
I don’t think so.
I struggled with this same
question, for a grueling 10 days. I racked my brain in coming up
with some kind of new entertainment adventure plan. What could I
possibly do, that’s kind of similar to last year, but isn’t
exactly the same as last year, but still could be fun, and allow
me to see something that I haven’t seen before.
And then, it hit me.
Well, actually it didn’t
really hit me, but the idea came in an email. In fact, I think I
got this email last year, but it didn’t dawn on me until I started
writing this, that this one single email would be the keystone to
my entertainment adventure for 2010.
And the answer is:
Comedy.
We’ll call it the “Laugh More Tour” for
2010.”
So, here’s the deal, I’ll only
see comedians I haven’t seen before. And given my track record so
far for seeing comedy shows, this shouldn’t be too hard. We’ll try
to mix in some classic people, some local NW people, who knows,
maybe even head up to Seattle for the weekend or something.
Do they have comedy in
Seattle? I know they have “Flannel,”
and “Grunge,” but I’m not sure about Comedy. We’ll See.
Now, since comedy shows may be
a bit harder to find during some months, I might have to do some
substitutions. Like, if August looks to be complete comedy
dry-spell, I might have to go buy every Steve Martin
DVD I can find, and watch those at home.
But, honestly, could you
imagine if Steve actually toured this year?
I would be So There. In fact,
he is out-on-the-road, right now, promoting his new album.
Oh, you didn’t know? Steve
plays banjo, and he just released a new bluegrass album. It’s
getting rave reviews.
So, I am making up this rule:
If Steve Martin comes around to play banjo, and I go, and it’s not
an actual comedy show, then guess what?
I’m saying that it counts
anyway. Because, as far as I’m concerned, if Steve Martin walks
onto a stage with a banjo, THAT’s going to be funny.
After all, he did say that “Comedy Is Not
Pretty.”
And now, ON WITH THE (Comedy)
SHOW!
PS – I would really like to
say thanks to everybody who helped make my blog possible. Thanks
to all the bands and artists who took the time to do the
interviews and came to the Gorge to play. Thanks to all the bands
I went to see, and to all the folks who came with me. It’s really
been fun doing this, believe me. Thanks to Esther Smith, who takes
the time to actually get this stuff on the internet and lets no
typo go unnoticed, and thanks to the Hood River News for providing
the Web space. –JD.
12 Shows in 12 Months Summary (2009)
January
River City
Bluegrass Festival featuring Ralph Stanley and Riders in the
Sky
(Portland
Convention Center)
February
Blondie
(Roseland)
March
Leon Redbone
(Aladdin)
April
Greensky Bluegrass Band
(River
City
Saloon)
May
The Flatlanders
(Aladdin)
June
The Wallflowers
(Wonder Ballroom)
July
Counting Crows
(Maryhill Amphitheater)
August
Colin Hay Band
(Aladdin)
September
Pearl Jam, Ben Harper
(Clark Co
Amphitheater)
October
Devil Makes Three
(Wonder Ballroom)
November
John Hammond,
David Lindley
(Aladdin)
December
Railroad Earth
(Crystal Ballroom)
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